An Escape

After being in the Hospital Wing he needed to get away. He made his way out of the school and down the ground and to the lake by the forest.

He sat on the shore looking out across the lake. His head thumping and heart pounding. His stomache turning.

He watched the water coming on and going out, wishing it was that easy to get away from it all. He was there to protect.. not to harm those he was meant to be looking after. He careless and know he was paying for it, even his worse fear was real now and he just wanted to get away to escape from it all, to just clear the slate, fix everything, or to wake up from this nightmare.. He put his head in his hand in despair and sobbed

Tonks walked silently behind Lupin hearing him sobing, she took off her blood stained cloak and threw it away. Without saying a word she sat down beside him and looked out onto the lake.


She didn't know what to say, or even if she should say anything at all.

He heard someone next to him and looked up to see Tonks through his watery eyes. He then moved away from her and looked out across the lake and asked.
"What are you doing down here.. thought you would be at the wing helping the others I hurt, and Harriate who's life I've ruined.."

"You haven't ruined her life.... Everyone in the wing are fine, most are sleeping. You're the one i'm more concerned with." Tonks didn't look at him but contiued to look over the lake. "I know this isn't easy for you, but I'm here to help you through it." she said

"I made her like me! I should bloody know what she's going to be put through!!" he shouted, angry but more upset.
"You can't even look at me!" he said looking at her with tear in his eyes. He picked up a pebble and chucked it into the lake and stood up pulling on his hair before kicking a nearby tree. "I shouldn't of been here!!!"

"Ok, I know life isn't going to be easy for her, and I know I can't know what she will be put through." She walked over to him, stopped right in front of him and looked at him. "We could never have know anything like this was going to happen. The point is we can't change it now. No-one holds a grudge against you... not even harriate. You are not tottaly to blame here, there were other wolves besides you in the forest tonight." she continued to look at him.

"You don't know anything! you don't know what she's thinking, she much have been terrified like I was! she's going to be outcast, live a life of pain.. and what's worse.. I can't do anything to make it better.. to change it!! the other creatures in there never bit her.. or attacked you did they!!" he snapped "How woud you feel if your worst fear begam reality... that if you actually used your brain, you could have pervented it!! I should have warned the students, but I never did!!"

"You're right, I don't know what she's thinking or how hard her life is going to be now. I won't even pretend to know what you have been through. No-one can change what's happened, and I know there isn't much we can do for her, but she has friends here, they understand what it may be like for her and are willing to help her. Didn't you say that you were happier when you had Sirius and James accompany you every month?"
"I can imagine how it must be for you to see someone else become like you because I know how much you hate the full moon and how much you hate that part of yourself. And in the forest the other wolves did attack us, we all contributed to each others wounds, no-one involved can say they were totally innocent."

Lupin broke down and fell to his knees infront of the tree and hit it with his fist cracking under the pressure not knowing what to do anymore, knew he couldn't stay, He under stood her but all his mind was telling him was it was his own fault, he's a monster and should be killed or go and live like one

Tonks's eyes began to water at seeing Lupin in despair. She bent down in front of him, lifted his head gently with her hand and wrapped her arms around him. Hoping make him feel a bit better, she wasn't sure how things were going to go now, or where Lupin would go when the full moon rose again. Back to Grimmauld Place seemed the best idea, but kept quiet about the next night.

Lupin tried to push her away but was too weakened by his emotions and just wept into her shoulder. After losing Sirius.. now this and everything going on with Harry he was cracking under the pressure. He just wanted to close his eyes and not wake.

Tonks continued to hold him and let him cry as much as he had to. Tonks knew that Lupin was finding in harder to cope recently, she refused to leave him on his own and was determined to help him. If only he would talk about it, it would be easier for him to bear, and she could help him bear it.

Tonks didn't say a word but just let Lupin cry it out.

Meanwhile Cody walked outside to get some air when he finally awoke from his sleep,He walked over to the lake and then sat down next to looking out towards the great lake and was having backflashes from last night during the transfomation,he felt slightly guilty of what has happened that nightmare night.

Lupin pushed her away when he heard a noise and looked round to see Cody coming out of the forest. He brushed away his tear and slowly got to his feet which were like jelly

Tonks also got up and turned to face Cody.

"Are you alright?" she asked him.

Cody looked at the professor and then at Tonks and then backed away slowly he slightly remebers half of the things of what happened in the forest!.

Cody looked and then walked over to the lake and sat down on the grass and then brought his legs up to his chest and had tears flowing down his eyes,he was in pain but only some scars still was bleeding

Lupin just lost it and walked away from Tonks's side, he'd hurt too many people that night..

Tonks sat dow and leaned against the nearest tree watching Cody and listning to Lupin walk away.

"Cody? Are you in any pain?" Tonks called over conscerned.

Cody turned and looked at Tonks and then said"only slightly,but i am feeling really depressed and guilty cause i am an werewolf too,do not tell anyone that!"he shoot up and looked at Tonks.

Cody looked away and then cried and then said"I hurt someone too!".he looekd at tonks and broke down in tears

"We all did. Don't worry.... your secret is safe with me. Everyone has been patched up and are fine. They're in the hospital wing, just take your time before going up and getting patched up yorself." she said.

Cody looked at Tonks and then nodded,he looked and then said"Was Professor lupin with you too!"he looked and saw that he walked off.Cody looked and then felt the scars was hurting him so much,they were stinging him when the clothes touched them

"Yes, Remus was present the whole night. He feels responsible for what happened" she said, saddened. "I'm glad you didn't get hurt too badly." she tried to smile.

Cody looked and then said"he should not blame himself,it was his werewolf side what tooked hold,the wolf in him was trying to protect the cub,that was me! so i feel really responsible!"he looked at tonks and began to walk back slowly but kept on falling over,he looked at his leg and saw it was bad with alot of cuts on it.

Tonks stood up and walked over to him.

"Here let me help you." she said grabbing his arm. "I spoke to Remus about what happened tonight, I don't think he feels as resonsible but it will still take a while for him to get over what happened last night."

Cody looked and then nodded they began to head back towards the castle,Cody looked and then said"I can not go into the hosptal wing!"